Thursday, July 27, 2006

This is a repost...not because I'm being lazy (at least I don't think so) but because it got missed in the shuffle and I'd really like to hear what people have to say about it.

Holla at ya Girl...



Women shouldn’t be dunking?........Are you kidding me!


I a woman and I play Basketball. I can even play better than most of my male counter parts. I played in High School and then in College. My coach told me that I was a great, versatile player and could do also anything I wanted to with a ball. I even played against the men’s team in practice to help them with their defense. The men’s coach even told me that if they didn’t have a women team he would have loved to have had me on his team. I might not have started but I definitely would have played.

Basically the only thing that I couldn’t do with the a basketball was dunk. I’m 5’7” so that’s not so much of a surprise but that is the only limitation that is on the women’s game as a whole. YES, men can dunk far more easily because pound for pound they have more muscle mass. So, that’s what helps the Nate Robinson’s and Allen Iverson’s to get up there. The only thing that will get us (women) up there is our height. But the likes of Nickie Teasly, Ivy Latta and Sheryl Whoops have shown that we can do everything else just as well if not more efficient.

And wow, we have women player’s hear and there that can dunk. Not all have the publicity surrounding them like say a Candace Parker but all with the ability to SLAM the ball directly into the rim. I’m just happy that we are one step closer to having a ‘complete’ game but then you have idiots like Jason Whitlock who are just hater who want to talk crap just because they have a mike (or because he is a misogynist who can’t stand to see the gaps between the sexes closing).

In an article that he recently wrote named, “Women Shouldn’t be dunking” he had the nerve to say, and I quote, “Well, I guess that explains why, when Parker laid the ball in the basket and grabbed the rim afterward twice in Tennessee's rout of Army in the NCAA Tournament, it was hailed as man-walking-on-the-moon news in the sports world. Parker was the first woman to (almost) dunk twice in a college game.”

He went on to say, “What's next? First women's hooper to cover her entire body in prison tattoos? WNBA players investigated for running up huge tabs in the champagne room of the Gold Club? Sue Bird strangles her coach at practice? Lisa Leslie attacks beer-tossing empty seat, sparks nasty melee between players and bored arena ushers?...............Making a big deal of Parker's slam lay-ins is an insult to women's college basketball, and potentially damaging to the game. We're promoting the very act that is credited with ruining men's basketball, and we're telling female players the quickest way to get on "SportsCenter" and become a star is by dunking the basketball………The game deserves better…………Sports fans are not ignoring women's college basketball because the games are no good. We're ignoring it because the game has refused to properly define itself and mark its own territory. No one wants to see women play the game the way that men do. Hell, did you miss the Team USA fiasco? A lot of Americans don't want to see men play the game the way men do.”

Mr. Whitlock, maybe if you didn’t weight about 320 at about 6’2’ you would be able to dunk too. But until you drop about 120 pounds don’t hate on people with ability. The woman player you see today fell in love with the basketball of the present. Not just Kobe and Lebron but the Michael and Dominique that you would probably defend to you death. We were there when Vince put his arm in the hoop…we were there to see Shaq throw an ally-oop to Kobe. Dunking and flying through the air is in the sprit and at the very heart of the game. You are just mad that we are just beginning to get a taste that only men have been privileged to.

Don’t you realize that you article does nothing but ignite a time bomb that will sooner or later widen the gap the we female ball player have fought so hard to close. And we are trying to close it not just for us but for young girls out here on the ball courts waiting to get a chance to play…and some BOY is telling her, “Girls can’t play. Not like we can.”

Candace, dunk 3 times next time, girl!!!!

What are your thoughts? Do you think woman should dunk in games? What do you think was his motive for writing this article? Now that women CAN dunk, what else do you think needs to be done to take women basketball closer to the next level?

My thoughts is Money….but that’s a-whole-nother Blog.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006


To Blog or to Myspace? .....That’s my question.


Well family, in my pursuit of happiness and contacts I embarked into the Blog here at Blogger.com about 6 months ago. And it’s been great so far; although my attention span comes and goes from time to time I love to spend time posting new blogs, when I can, and reading all of yours. But, like every good marriage there comes a time when you and your loyalties are tested; that time has come. There is another trying to come in between us, and her name is Myspace.

You know her, the networking whore that she is. Coming in with her fancy backgrounds and pictures and friends… How’s a woman supposed to be faithful with all that waving in your face. Ordinary people and Celebs all in the same place…who can resist. So…I hit it…twice. That’s right I have two pages; one for business, one for pleasure. And it’s good too; you should see all the people I’ve met and sh@t I’m learning about designing my page.

So, now I have a dilemma. Do I try to juggle both the women…I mean spaces in my life…do I stay home with my first love (or would my first love be Black Planet)…Or, do I with my Miss New Booty, Myspace, and start blogging there (like people go there to blog).


Like they say, “Ain’t nothing better than p@ssy…except some new p@ssy!”


Holla at ya Girl...

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

How many of us have them……Friends!

Do you ever get tired of being the nice one? Of being the strong one? Of being the one that everyone turns to as soon as they have an emotional problem? The one that they need to speak to set everything straight in there mind and in their life…No? Well I do; especially when I get nothing in return in the friendship.

It’s funny how every once in a while I begin to realize that I need to start taking my own advice when it comes to friends. I have 3 simple rules when it comes to friends: 1. You can not dump your bad energy on me if I can not dump mine on you. 2. I can call you with good news and you should be able to be sincerely happy for me…Not just sound like it or revert back to talking about your streak of bad luck. 3. If I can come to your house and chill you can come to mine.

Those are my 3 laws. And there are little sub-laws that go with them but they are the basics. I developed them right around the time when the good friend I wrote about before and I had that big falling out. I began to realize that I wasn’t getting to return that I felt that I deserved from the investment that I made in my friends. Because that’s what it is…an investment.

Every time you pick up the phone at 1 in the morning and it’s your friend crying their eyes out and you stay on the line with them until they calm down and feel better you are investing in them with the hope that they will do the same for you one day, whether or not that day will ever come. Sooner or later you start to realize if said investment will ever pay off. I guess that’s kind of what I’m going though now…evaluating the relationships in my life.

I have a girlfriend that I love very dearly and whom would be married to if people could take their head out of their ass. We’ll reach 4 years together in a month and a half and we support each other through everything. She is my best friend but some times you don’t want to talk about everything with your significant other so no matter what people say friends are important.

So, in my life I have 3 people that I would refer to as close friends and one of them gave me a little reality check while she once again went through problems with her girlfriend. As usual she spoke to me about it, even “f”ed up my high Friday night as she cried and asked why I thought the girl phone was off. She was just being dramatic looking for someone to listen to her while everyone else was out side chillin’. Being the good friend that I was I spoke to her but after the third call I started to be short with her to get her off the damn phone. I began to realize that it wasn’t fair that she monopolized my time like this and then it hit me. She would do the same for me if I was going through it.

If it was 10 P.M. and I called her about some problems I was having she would be like, “Dog, I wish I could help you but I can’t even fix my own. But Yo, I got work in the morning, so…call me tomorrow and let me know what happens.” Not that I would ever go to her with problems like that but I feel that if you’re gonna a friend then I should be able to. It’s like I just realized how self absorbed she can be and I remembered why I don’t refer to everyone as friends.

I spoke to one of my remaining close friends and a co-worker about it yesterday and they both said that I expected too much from them even if they were friends. This is definitely true. I am a very good friend and can be selfless at times and I disappoint myself by thinking that being that way for people means that they will do it for me. So…...it’s time to do some spring cleaning ya’ll. I’m not gonna cut her off but I’m definitely not gonna over extend myself like I use to. From now on, unless it’s a genuine emergency, I’m not going out of my why like I usually do unless it’s family or my woman. True friends will understand and I won’t even need to explain.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

“OH, Lord…My Baby”

When I was growing up, a young feminist of about 12 years old, I was not in the least bit interested in having children. I was even more so determined to prove all of my family wrong who said that my attitude would change as I got older and got married. Little did they know I was already discovering my desires and knew good and well that they were not the same as theirs. And knowing deep down that I loved differently, I figured that the “normal” life that they lived was not a life that I would have to look forward to. So, I looked forward to the next best thing…

January 13, 1989, Anita was born and I finally had a little sister. Not that I was looking forward to it. I was 9 years her senior and was enjoying being the baby of the family at the time but, the older we got the more I realized I loved being her protective big sis. And, over the years this hasn’t changed. She has her mom and dad there for her, day and night, but I was also there like a second mother; supporting her in her achievements and disappointments. Even when I went away for college I promised her that I was always just a call away. I was and still am ‘Fesha’, the cool big sister that teaches you what you need to know for life, in our day and age, all while having fun together.

Then it happened…she was turning 16. She was becoming a woman right before our eyes. She was popular, smart and oh yes, she had a boyfriend…Jon (said with distain). He was a year and a half older then her so when he was a senior in high school when she was just a sophomore. You could just imagine the disapproval that my parents and two older brothers showed but I was the one who stayed calm and decided not to be the over reacting, hypocritical people that everyone else was acting like. I just gave my sister a call. See it became a big scandal in a small town once everyone found out that their little Anita had a boyfriend who actually wanted to come over to the house and meet my parents...like he was a grown man or something.

Anyway, as usual, my mom calls and asks for me to speak to her. I did what I was told but I don’t know what she wanted me to say. Everything she probably had in mind, I have already told her since she was at least 12. Now, some of you might be like, “what are you crazy? Talking to a child that age about sex is dangerous. You might as well tell her to go ahead and have sex.” Now, I understand where you are coming from; at the age of 12 no one is ready to have sex. But, I believe that ignorance is the greatest sin and if you think that your child won’t have natural sexual urges by the time they are 14 you are in a dangerous state of denial.

People, especially these “deeply religious” folk seem to conveniently forget about how there bodies felt when they were that age. Those are the certain things in life that are nature and not nurture. It will happen; your children will have sex sooner or later and the sooner you get prepared for that the better for you and them. When I felt she was old enough I began speaking to my sister about the feelings she’s going to begin to have or have been feeling and warning her about the consequences. The older she got the more explicit I got and the more that I began to speak to her as an equal. I think a big problem with the world is that we underestimate the intelligence of young people and think that telling them “DON’T” should be go enough.

You know that when you were younger someone telling you don’t was not enough to stop you from sticking a penny in the electric socket. That’s why I think that explaining why and saying not yet is the best policy. My philosophy is, “I told you that that was a street and there are car out there that might not stop. You can’t blame me if go out there, playing in the street and get hit.” So I did what I had the do and one the day of her 16th birthday, I told her I loved her, that I was proud of all that she has accomplished and that I was sure that she was prepared by all of us the foreseen things that lye ahead.

I also said to her,” You are a beautiful young woman and I expect for you to have boyfriends. I just don’t expect for you to get pregnant before you have a chance to experience the things in life that I know you deserve. Graduating from High School, running track at the college you want to attend and getting a degree for the profession that you choose; don’t let sex take that away from you through pregnancy or a disease.” Then before I finished the conversation I told her that if she wanted some condoms she should hesitate to ask because sooner or later she would have sex and I wanted her to be ready for all things in life. A statement I always shared with her was, “Now-a-days getting pregnant was getting off easy”, and I think she understand that.

Now, yesterday I had another talk with her since she is in N.Y. for a week looking for a job and her boyfriend is in town. I asked her straight up, after reassuring her that everything would be cool and that she could trust me, if she had had sex before. When she responded “yes”, I took it better than I thought I would and just asked if she had used protection. She said she did and that the person she slept with was Jon. She went on to tell me that she loves and that he is a special person. They brook up because they figured it would be best when he went any to college but soon after realized that they still wanted to be together.

I wasn’t happy but I was proud that I…I mean we had raised her right had after our conversation I gave her 2 condoms to put in to her wallet. “Don’t grow up to fast to suffer long,” I said to her then we watched Episode III. That my daughter no matter what. In my head I said, “OH, Lord…My Baby”, but sooner or later we have to let go and let God and let them use what you have taught. Prayer never hurt either….

How did you feel the first time that you found out that you younger sidling had sex? Where you can a parent figure to them as I am to my sister?


Holla at yo girl!!

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Ha-ha! You got tagged!!!!


Damn, HoustonNY....Usually when I get tagged I at least get dinner and a movie too.
Well here we go…


If you were to be the opposite sex for one day, what would you do?
After I jerked off a couple times in the morning I’d go around singing all the Luther Vandross songs that I knew to every pretty woman I met on the street just to make them smile. Then I’d get my girlfriend pregnant.

If you had to name the most difficult thing about being a teenager today, what would you say? Trying to stay grounded in reality with the fantasy world of TV and the Music Industry being glorified.

If you had to name the most embarrassing moment of your life, when was it?
I can’t believe that I’m about to reveal this, but to thine own self and that stuff…Well, I was in about the 5th grade or something and we were taking a test. It was so quite that you could hear a pin drop. I completed my test and got up to hand it in when I accidentally past gas. And it was obvious that it was me so I just walked al the way to the front of the room, place my test on the teacher desk, returned back to my desk and put my head down as the whole class laughed at me…very traumatizing.

If you had to name the most overrated actor in Hollywood, who would it be?
I’ll have to agree with my boy Terrance and say Samuel L. Jackson! I kind of like him though but he’s not the good to get the shin e that he gets.

If you had to name the one personality trait that you have tried the hardest to change in yourself, what would you say?
How much I procrastinate…it never ceases to screw me over.

If you could go back for one minute to the Garden of Eden and give Adam advice, what would you say?
Terrance had it right…“You should have listened to Steve.”

If you were to name the best “I told you so” you ever got to deliver, what was it?
I hate “I told you so’s” because I don’t like to gloat and I had when people do it so I don’t do it. But, I tell you this much…the last 2 titles the Lakers won I was like the village pariah rooting for them…I’m a LAKERS FAN. When they won I didn’t say anything but the huge grin on my face said it all. “Take that, take that, take that!”

If you were Madonna, what would you do for your next publicity stunt?
If I was Madonna I would retire after this last tour buy the Beatles catalog from Michael and chill with my millions. But, if I had to do a stunt I would fake my own kidnapping and drop double album of songs that I supposedly wrote when I was being held captive and songs about being glad to be alive. I need to be an A&R.

If you could have a lifetime 50 percent discount in any single store at your local mall, which store would it be in?
It would probably be The Home Depot. It would be “This Old House” everyday back at my house.

If you could have one more pet, what kind would you get, and what would you name it?
A Chewelah with lots of attitude named Killer.

If you could have God perform one miracle today, what would you want it to be?
Rewind the last 6 years and make Al Gore President.

If you could spend next New Year’s Eve doing anything, what would you do, and who would you spend it with?
I would take all of my close friends to Las Vegas, all expenses paid, and host a party at Rain on top of the Palms Hotel with strippers and Missy would perform all of her greatest hits for us. Then my girl friend and I would go back to our room and have Alicia Keys…Hey it’s my fantasy! Get your own.

If you were to set your country’s immigration policy, what would it be?
Send every one with out a valid green card back and make them wait their turn. P.E.R.I.O.D.

If you were given the power to settle the issue of gays in the military, what policy would you set? My policy is that there shouldn’t even be a policy. Everyone would is able bodied and over 18 should be able to fight for THEIR country.

If you could have one person you have lost touch with call you up tonight and invite you to dinner, who would you want it to be?
My Ex-girlfriend. I really wanted for us to be friends but she thought other wise.

If you could change on thing about your love life, what would it be?
Believe it or not, lesbians slow up on the sex too after being with each other for a while so I would love to go back to the way that we used to go at it when we first met…I’m talking everyday in every way.

If you could have prevented one book from ever having been written, which book would it be?Being a writer myself I can not say that someone doesn’t have the right to say what they want; it’s our right. Now, with that being said, I don’t want to hear anything when I drop my lesbian novels.

If you have to name the best music album ever recorded, which would you select?
Notorious B.I.G. - “Ready to Die.” I am a hip hop head, I love every song and I go nowhere with out it.

If you could have one thing made out of pure gold, what would you choose?
It’s kind of crass but I would like a small statue of something that starts with a P and ends with a Y (no, not a pony). You can ask ANY ONE would loves women and they will tell you that it is the most beautiful thing God ever created.

If God were to whisper one thing in your ear, what would you like Him to say?
“You are strong enough to make it through everything that lies ahead and everything will turn out fine.”

That was cool. Maybe I'll throw up the 70 things about me blog soon....Holla, My peoples.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

I might need to go to the doctor cause I just got tagged...


Damn you Terrance!!! I should slap you like a ball-headed step child that stole money out my purse after I stole it out of her daddy’s wallet. Okay, Okay...since I too appreciate the Blogs I read daily I’ll play along.

The following are Bloggers that I check out as often as possible (sometimes twice a day) and why I appreciate you:


~Terrance-HoustonNY~ He’s one of my closest friends and one of the most intelligent and down to earth people that you could ever know. His posts are always thought provoking and inventive. I’m actually privy to some of his posts before they are published due to the fact that I work with him. Love ya, Babe...You’re a Doll...

Lost...in Translation I just love the love and support that he gives his friends. I know from personal experience that he is a great guy and his page always sparks nostalgia. “You killed my momma bird, Gina.”
For 10 points what was Momma Pain's bird's name?

LUVIN ME It's nice to see how a real lady handles drama. Her blogs take me back to college when I was watching soaps religiously and she is the heroine that I’m rooting for. Don’t ever let them get you down, Girl.

Voices In My Head When I say that this man is a Comedian on the low, any body who has read his posts before can testify that I’m not joking. The man says the sh*t that we all want to deep down and I love him for it.

A Day In The Life I started to read his blog after reading the comments that he left on other blogs. I love the other points of view that he offers with just a touch of humor...reminds me a little of myself.

BEING BOBBY BROWN JR. (not Whitney's Husband) I first met him at a little restaurant in the village while he was complimenting my girlfriends on her breasts. He was very funny and, as they say in church, ‘my sprit just took him’. It wasn't as much surprising, but very refreshing to hear or read how articulate he was voicing opinions on his blog. “BOBBY” (a la Whitney).

Chronicles-of-a-sexy-fat-chick It was her name that got my attention first…what can I say I’m a sucker for big girls. As I read one of her comments on Luvin Me’s page, I liked her personality and point of view so I checked out her page and so should you (that one was for free ya’ll). Hey, search through her page for some of her poetry ya’ll.

Last but definitely not least is A REASON TO LIVE. She is also a good friend of mine and although we don’t see eye to eye on some topics, I do value her opinion. I also love reading about what’s new in her life in hope that she doesn’t let the stress of life get her down.

WWHHEEWW...well that wasn’t that painful. I enjoyed just thinking and asking myself, “Well, why do I read that damn page anyway?” Okay gang, Holla at ya’ll later. I’m gonna try to have the original post I was planning on putting up BEFORE I GOT TAGGED up here by tonight. Love you guys...

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

No, We like you guys...Really we do!

What I like to do with my blog is expose the myths that I believe divide our society on a daily basis. My aim is to give the readers another point of view so that maybe one day they my will understand or try to understand the 'other sides' plight. Because if there is one thing I hate it's an ignorant person trying to teach a subject they have no knowledge about. Furthermore, these people use their influence to make others think the way that they do when they themselves haven't even tried to educate themselves past the typical stereotypes. This if my futile attempt to change the world.


Today, I would like to address the myth of the “man hating lesbian”.

Yes, I’m calling it a myth because contrary to popular belief we (lesbians) do not hate men. In fact, many of us, including myself, grew up with several loving, male role models in our lives that we looked or continue to look up to. And, even more of us have men, gay or straight, that are friends...sometimes they're even our closest friends.

So, where did this myth come from?

Well, I’m not a sociologist but this is my view…
Women as a whole have trouble completely trusting men stemming form a bad history that they have either heard of or experienced themselves with men. Also, and all you Pastors out there need to write this down, almost 85% of woman, PERIOD, have experienced some type of sexual abuse. Be it at home, in the street or on a crowded train…eeewwww, flash back. And sometimes for a person who likes to be in control it’s hard for a woman knowing that most men can over power them and rape them at any moment.

Straight woman deal, with the sh*t because they love them and know that not all men are bad. We know this also…really we do…but it’s just that since we don’t need sex from men there is even less reason to want them around. Now, this is nothing to be offended over but some men can’t understand that some women don’t need them. But, they in turn need women to show them attention. Even if they are a lesbian, some men feel that deep down all women want d*ck. Which is NOT TRUE. A woman can like penetration but not like men; sorry to break it to you. Some men can’t get it through their hard heads that their hard heads are not the precious commodity that they thought they were so they will rape even the most butch looking women just to show that they are still the dominate one of the species.

Gay women resent this thinking so as a defense they simply try to stay away from most men. Another belief of mine is that some lesbians have a hard enough time finding mates and then to see women that they would love to love being mistreated and abused by men. From personal experience I can tell you I was IN LOVE with my roommate in college and wanted to snap the neck of her boy friend every time I had to console her after one of their arguments. I was like this woman is wasting away on this BOY.

Now, as far as Gay Men go with lesbians, I have never had any bad blood with them. People are people to me…no matter who they love. Some are assh*les and some are down the earth…I’m good friends with one and cool with others. But, I have seen the bad looks that they get when coming into a lesbian establishment and they are not pretty. Also, a friend of mine told me about an experience that he had just on line to get into a club that affected the way he views lesbians.

First of all I’d like to apologies for that even happening…because it shouldn’t…we should all be able to hang out and chill. Now, that being said, certain things run through the mind of a woman when we see ya’ll on the line. We ask ourselves, “Don’t you have enough places to look for women…why you got to try and pouch ours?” And we think that gay men have just as many if not more clubs that they can hang at, why they got to come into ours to? And some times there is just a vibe that you get when there is nothing but female energy in the room…and it feels good when we are just trying to have fun…mmm, just p*ssy everywhere…but I digress.

Sorry, guys but when we first see you all we see is a man; not a gay man but a man. So all those things I mentioned earlier come rushing back into our minds and we get on guard at first but hopefully we relax realize that you guys are not trying to threatening us…you just want to shake your ass too. And some of ya’ll can shake it better than us too….Don’t get gassed…I said SOME.

We love men seriously…some of us even get our sense of fashion of them…we just don’t LOVE love ya’ll. I hope that shed a little light on the subject and helps to bring us closer through conversation. So please tell me your thoughts…or past experiences with the subject.


(All thoughts and views are those of the Baby O. and are not those of Blogger.com or any affiliated sites.)


P.S. I would like to welcome ~~~Joy~~~ to our Blogger World. Here is her link so show her some love. www.theinnerbeautymovement.blogspot.com Snap, Snap, Snap… (A la Love Jones)